Community Over Competition

Women Supporting Women

This is something that has really been on my mind lately. A few months ago I struggled in a situation where I felt like I was being cyber bullied by someone I know in my heart I went above and beyond for as a friend. I take a lot of pride in being a loving, genuine and generous friend. Those of you that know me know I am first in line to offer my help, lend a hand or teach others.

I won’t get into details about that situation because then I would be wearing the same shoes that person wore when they walked all over me. Writing this post gives me mixed feelings because it’s not to satisfy myself and it’s definitely not to satisfy any bullies out there. It’s to raise awareness that if you are experiencing something similar, you are not alone.

“when a toxic person can no longer control you, they will try to control how others see you. The misinformation will feel unfair, but stay above it, trusting that other people will eventually see the truth, just like you did.”

After having two separate conversations lately where people I know and care about have gone through similar scenarios it really made me think about why this keeps happening? Enough cattiness. Enough treating people poorly. We as women and moms need to come together. We need to support one another. In doing so we are stronger, we are better and we can fight harder for what is right.

Let’s all be in one big girl squad where everyone can be a part of it and no one is excluded. Yup you heard me, everyone. This isn’t high school, this isn’t a clique where you have to do a certain thing or look a certain way. Let’s look at one another as equals because we all deserve that. We all have feelings.

“The truth is that once you’ve been bullied, you always wonder about peoples’ intentions and trust is hard and feels unnatural. Once you’ve seen and felt for yourself how cruel people can be, your perspective of people is forever altered and your instincts to be cautious are on high alert”

3 Steps to Help Someone Who is Bullied.

  1. Listen
  2. Encourage them to talk
  3. Remember that healing takes time

In relation to social media I think a lot of this negativity comes from their own insecurities or dare I say it jealousy. What is suppose to be a community is being turned into competition. Don’t spend your time comparing yourself to others. Try to avoid thoughts like ” How did that photo get so many likes?” or “I’ll be as good as so and so if I collaborate with that company too.”

Instead allow yourself to be creative and different while staying true to yourself. If you consume yourself with what everyone around you is doing you will be the only one left behind while everyone else reaches new successes. Always remember, it doesn’t matter what other people think and hard work always pays off.

” You can always tell who the strong women are. They are the ones you see building each other up instead of tearing each other down”

Community Over Competition

So, how do you embrace competition? Ask yourself what this means to you?
Community over competition means acknowledging that the whole point of life is *not* to be “the best” at anything, really, beyond being the best YOU. It means using your time to serve others via what you do best, lifting them up even higher than you’ve been lifted yourself. Building others up does not bring you down. Helping someone out does not inherently hurt you. Light only gets brighter by being shared.

” Find your tribe. Love them hard”

Community Over Competition + Blogging

Embrace your community like its your job because in a way, it is. As bloggers our whole schtick is to create a supportive online community. Give of yourself expecting nothing in return. Don’t expect people to follow you back, or exactly reciprocate whatever you do for them. That’s NOT relationship building – that’s mooching and trying to manipulate the system. It’s fake. And at the end of the day…it’s useless.

Long term growth and success only comes from genuine giving – building genuine relationships. Friendships built solely on tit for tat things, I hate to break it to ya: will not pass the test of time.

I would rather put in the effort and time to be a person with real, lasting friendships, and a real, genuine community, whose journey takes a little longer, than someone lacking friends and lacking community who “arrives” much faster than I do.

Community over competition means giving, giving, giving, knowing that karma uuuuusually comes full circle, but not expecting her to right this very second. By helping others you can simultaneously grow into your bigger, better, best self.

” In a world full of look at me girls be a come with me girl “


( Babes supporting babes sweater worn by me can be purchased here. Boss Babe sweater worn by Nikolina – Owner and Maker behind Pacific Knot can be purchased at Minted Method Shop. Arm knit blankets are coming soon to Pacific Knot and you can check her out on IG here in the mean time)

Thank you to the amazing babes that have welcomed me into their community. I am blessed and beyond honoured to call you my friends. Some of you have even become more like family. Stay kind and continue to celebrate each others successes without questioning our own. Cheers babes!

xo

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Frannie + Lilo Interview

Not Just a Shirt, a Motherhood Movement

Recently I had the pleasure of connecting with two amazing mama’s Francesca Brunsden and Lysanne Louter. These strong and inspiring ladies are the founders of Frannie + Lilo. In honour of October being International SIDS, Miscarriage and Infant Loss Awareness month I thought now would be the perfect time to introduce you to these two special and very brave ladies. They are totally killing this motherhood boss babe thing.

Francesca and Lysanne have both struggled with child loss, depression, anxiety, and post-tramatic stress disorder. They met in a prenatal class and quickly became friends when they had their baby boys Bodie & Finn 10 days apart.

Francesca is originally from Britain and now lives in Toronto. She is a queen-crafter, hair stylist and one brave bad ass mama. After her first miscarriage, Francesca’s son Phoenix was diagnosed with a rare genetic disorder at 24 weeks in utero. A condition that is often “incompatible with life”. After 15 hours of labour — and against all odds — Phoenix was born alive. He lived for 5 hours in his mothers loving arms. That day marked the beginning of a journey through grief that may never be over. Phoenix’s younger brother Bodie was born almost exactly one year after his due date. Bodie’s birth was a gift that has helped Francesca find her voice and passion again. Through Frannie + Lilo she hopes to raise money to support other mamas faced with this kind of tragedy. Click here to read Francescas full story on losing her son Phoenix.

Lysanne also lives in Toronto. She is an Emmy award-winning documentary filmmaker and one sincere, caring mama. After witnessing the horrific aftermath of the Rana Plaza factory collapse that killed 1100 people in Bangladesh Lysanne decided she wanted to start her own made-in-Canada clothing line. Lysanne was overcome with nightmares, panic attacks and deep depression for years after meeting the victims of the Rana Plaza tragedy. When her son Finnley was born her depression returned. It wasn’t until she began working on Frannie + Lilo did she imagine a way to move forward and turn her experiences into something positive for other moms.

Together their mission is to raise awareness about childloss, miscarriage, postpartum mood disorders and fight the taboo of disgussing these traumatic experiences. Knowing first hand how difficult motherhood can be they would like to support women wherever they are in their motherhood journey.  Inspired by the brave mamas they meet everyday. Inspired by each of their stories of child loss, miscarriage and struggles with depression and anxiety. They are making a difference in others lives by sharing their stories and empowering women to be proud mamas.

Frannie + Lilo began in July 2017 and is based out of Toronto. All shirts are ethical, eco-conscious, designed and made in Canada. The company was started to help support mamas in need. A portion of every shirt sold is donated to five different child loss and postpartum charities. We The Mamas is not just a t-shirt it’s a motherhood movement.

I asked Francesca and Lysanne these questions:

  1. What is the inspiration behind your design?
    Designs are inspired by all the brave women and mamas out there who struggle every day to take care of themselves and their beautiful families.
  2. Who do you look up to?
    Our mothers and grandmothers for teaching us unconditional love and patience.
  3. What does your ideal Saturday look like?
    Our ideal Saturday would start with an early morning run along the beach. Then we would pick up breakfast sandwiches and coffee and take Bodie and Finn to the park to play. The boys would have a nice long afternoon nap while we worked for a couple of hours. In the evening, we would make dinner with our husbands, put the boys to bed, and watch Netflix.
  4. What did you want to be when you grew up? Why?
    Lysanne: I wanted to be a journalist and a photographer because I felt I saw things differently than most people and wanted to help make a difference in people’s lives.
    Francesca: I wanted to compete with England’s Olympic swim team because I loved the water and wanted to inspire other young girls to swim.
  5. What’s your guiltiest pleasure?
    Lysanne: Vanilla dip donuts with rainbow sprinkles
    Francesca: Reality TV shows
 (both these ladies are seriously speaking to my heart right now)
  6. What three things make you happiest in the world?
    Lysanne: Spending time with family, walking my dog on the beach and helping people.
    Francesca: Watching my son learn new things, spending time with family from abroad and traveling.
  7. Fill in the blanks:
    We believe… Being a mother is the hardest and best job in the world
    We love it when… Our boys do something they couldn’t do yesterday
    Words you live by are … 
“You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf” -Jon Kabat-Zinn

Important dates & Statistics:

  • October 2017 is International SIDS, Miscarriage and Infant Loss Awareness Month
  • October 9th-15th, 2017 is Infant Loss Week
  • October 15th, 2017 is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day
  • One in four pregnancies ends in miscarriage
  • Up to 25% of mothers face some kind of postpartum depression or anxiety

I hope you have enjoyed getting to know these incredible mamas as much as I have. I would like to say thank you to Francesca and Lysanne for sharing so much of yourselves with me and everyone following along. If you would like to follow along with these two check them out on all their social media channels linked below: Facebook– www.facebook.com/wethemamas/
Instagram- www.instagram.com/wethemamas/
Twitter – www.twitter.com/wethemamas/
Pinterest – www.pinterest.com/wethemamas/

Shop the entire collection here. Sign up for their newsletter and save 15% of your purchase and for the month of October receive free shipping!

Motherhood is something I myself am extremely thankful for. Being a mom brings out the best parts of myself and it’s all because of these boys. Check out all three of us below wearing our shirts to support these mamas and their cause. To anyone out there struggling with any kind of loss or trauma please always remember you are not alone, you are strong, you are beautiful and there is always someone you can turn to.

xo

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Thanksgiving Weekend

Thankful, Grateful & Blessed

This weekend was all fall y’all! Saturday started out unlike most of our Saturdays because we actually got to sleep in! (like we are talking 9:30 people) The boys didn’t have any soccer over the holiday weekend so I took the opportunity to go run a few errands while the hubs stayed home and made the boys breakfast. Freedom! How good does it feel to go shopping solo?!

Overly excited to have a little me time a few errands turned into being out most of the day – oops!  All solo shopping trips must include a stop at Homesense so naturally that’s where I went first. Next stop was Muse Social Fashion House because mama needed those new faux leather boots they just got in.

Then the usual grocery store stop. Also had to hit up the Costume shop. No luck at all finding a costume for myself but at least the boys are all set for Halloween! Stay tuned to see what the boys are being for Halloween.

My last stop for the day was a bakery in Fort Langley but little did I know that this weekend was the Cranberry Festival. 30 mins to find parking and hours of walking around all the vendors at the festivals later I made it back home to make dinner and finish off the day with a movie.

Sunday came and we were off to the pumpkin patch. The boys ran through the hay maze and corn maze on repeat. They sipped on hot chocolate and enjoyed a treat before heading to the haunted house. Then off to the patch to find our pumpkins. Noah and Joey went traditional with their orange pumpkins. Cruz picked white because well monochrome – duh! I was on the hunt for a nice white one myself until we walked up to the patch to find  grey pumpkins! Mike and I both ended up getting the spooky grey pumpkins. Mike went to load up the pumpkins while the boys raced through the maze a few more times and played a few games.


Back at home everyone got cleaned up for family dinner. Sunday dinners have always been a tradition at my parents but turkey, stuffing and pumpkin pie always make it even more enjoyable. Props to my mom for once again pulling off a delicious feast. Cheers to family, friends, food & health. Cruz surprisingly not a fan of turkey unlike his big brother Joey but he loved his first taste of pumpkin pie.

I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend spending time with their loved ones and the people closest to them.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours from me and mine.

xo

 

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Hey Girl Hey!

10 Things You Probably Didn’t Know About Me

(Outfit deets: Cruz is wearing Ole.Design beanie, Huxbaby knit sweater, Tattrd threads jeans & Pretty Brave high tops. My outfit is head to toe Muse from their new fall 17 collection that you can shop TOMORROW – click here to check out their IG for info on how you can sip bubbly, shop and save)

With quite a few new followers I thought I would do a little introduction and tell you 10 things about myself that you may or may not already know.

  1. I’m Whitney and I turned 30 this year — which I have to say has been pretty fantastic so far! I am a stay at home mom to three boys who keep me constantly on my toes. Like seriously can mama have one sip of coffee before you climb on the table and try to swing from the light fixtures? Who am I kidding, coffee is over rated wine is where it’s at. When it’s too early for wine dance parties get us through the day.
  2. I can’t whistle to save my life. Many have tried to teach me this skill and failed. Playing referee to our three boys sure would be a lot easier tho if I knew how don’t you think?
  3. The sound of people chewing in a quiet room drives me C R A Y – C R A Y . I have to put on the tv, music, or GET AWAY asap. Aka before I rip the offending food out of their mouth, pull my hair out in a blind rage & glare in their general direction. Especially people who chew with their mouths open. I mean come on! Manners people…
  4. I have watched every single season of The Bachelor/ Bachelorette. It’s my not-so-guilty pleasure. I will stay up until 1 am to watch it in peace and quiet then be tired A F the next day but it’s sleep well lost. No matter how scripted or unrealistic the show might be, I love the possibility of a love story. No matter how it happens.
  5. Italy & Bora Bora are at the very top of my Travel list. Italy for obvious reasons, Its beautiful – duh! It’s where my family is from and a part of my culture that I would love to experience and learn more about. Bora Bora because I am a total beach bum. My ideal KIDLESS getaway is an all-inclusive with my hubs on a tropical beach or private hut over the south pacific sea and a minimum of 30 degree weather.
  6. I’m slightly OCD about the way my house is kept and where things belong – No boys the floor will not do. Under your beds and in the closets will not do. See all those organized bins giving you the perfect spot for each and every one of your 10,000 toys, those will do just perfect. When everything else in life is chaotic, having an organized home gives me a much-needed sense of order and control.
  7. Pizza and Tiramisu are my favourite foods. I just friggin love them!
  8. I am deathly afraid of spiders – it feels like I can’t breathe when I see there is one in the same room as me. I recently told my husband if someone offered me 5 billion to touch a spider I don’t think I’d be able to do it. Luckily I live in a house full of boys who don’t seem to mind them at all. My heroes.
  9. On the daily you’ll find me in active wear. Looking like I’ve been at the gym when I actually haven’t. Otherwise I’m an oversized sweater, ripped jeans and LWT type of girl.
    (Brandy Melville are my fav JTLYK because who isn’t on the market for more LWT’s?)
  10. I met my husband while he was filling in at the shop I was working at. Little did we know years later we would end up at a company ski trip in Whistler together. Many adorable texts & a few cheesy pick up lines later (by few I mean 100’s) our story began.

Now, tell me something I don’t know about you! I love getting to know the babes supporting me in this crazy journey. Comment below and share something about yourself, it would seriously make my day!

Anything else you want to know? Ask me them below and I’ll answer!

xo

 

 

p.s I am such a sucker for any insta-worthy wall. Big shout out to my girl Nikolina for telling me about this aaaamazing paper flower wall.

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Getting Stuff Done

8 Tips for managing your time, getting stuff done and feeling good about it!

With so few hours in the day, hundreds of emails and notifications to keep up with, projects left unfinished or piling up, learning how to manage your time is crucial. Both boys are officially in school now and starting all their extra curricular activities this week so I really need to up my time management game since we have had a fairly laid back summer – like I’m talking our floaties are still inflated sitting in the garage from all the time we spent at the lake & yes that’s going on my to do list. Finding a good balance can be a struggle for many of us moms so I am putting together a list of tips I use to stay organized and on time.

Top 5 Mistakes that cause stress:
1. The first mistake is being overwhelmed with an out of control to do list.
2.Not creating a plan or a schedule for your life.
3.Not having a morning ritual
4.Not practicing self care.
5.Not having boundaries for social media, family time and personal time.

Incase you didn’t know I am seriously OCD so naturally I am going to start with decluttering. Declutter your life, your desk and your to do list. You’ll start to feel better already I promise. It feels good to get rid of clutter that is bringing you down.

Next step is to Plan! Be realistic with your daily expectations and make sure you stick to them. Checking tasks off as you go is a great way to stay motivated. While you’re at it, make yourself a morning ritual.

Now that you have your tasks for the day, prioritize them. Remember it’s not a race to get everything done the fastest. Try to be the most effective. Keep focused – eye on the prize. Once you get to a task, make sure you complete it no matter what. There’s no room for procrastination. Most people tend to tackle easy tasks first to push out the difficult ones. Don’t fall into this trap. Once you get organized, STAY organized. Getting organized takes longer than all these tips combined so once you are, stay organized. Plus it will become effortless the more you stick with it.

Here is what a successful day looks like in my shoes…

1. I set my alarm for 30 mins before I actually need to get up. Getting an early start and gaining that extra 10-30 mins starts the day with little to no stress which is key when your making lunches, setting out clothes, feeding three kids three different breakfasts and trying to get two of them to different schools on time. I call this the morning hustle and I know you all have your own version of this.

2. Picture the desired result. Set this is as your intention for the day.
Use an affirmation to start the day on a positive note. Here are a couple affirmations I like:
I love myself I believe in myself, I support myself.
I have the freedom and power to create the life I desire

3. Set your schedule. List your to do’s. Group similar tasks for more efficiency.
Here is an example of what an average day looks like for me:
6:30 – alarm
7:50 – Noah off too middle school
8:15 – Joey off to elementary school
8:35 – gym/exercise
10:00 – Plan dinner, go to grocery store if needed
10:15 – run errands
11:15 – nap time/house work
12:00 – catch up on emails
12:30 – work on projects
2:30 – school pick up
3:00 – start making dinner
5:00 – eat dinner and get boys ready for soccer.
7:00 – Bath & Bedtime routines for all 3 boys
8:00 – MW time ( Mike & Whitney – this usually consists of our fav reality tv and putting our feet up)

Incase you are looking at this list thinking she doesn’t eat breakfast or lunch and where is Cruz? We eat and he is attached to my hip 24-7. This is just an example. If I wrote out every second of the day in between each one of these steps would include, playing, teaching, changing, feeding & boobing Cruz every 30 mins – at least that’s what it feels like some days.

4. Select your top three and keep focused on your priorities. Get to work. Starting small to gain momentum can sometimes help keep you motivated but remember don’t take the easy ones and neglect the hard ones. Once you’ve started one task don’t start another until this one is completed.

5. Plan for tomorrow. Set your future self up for success.

6. Practice gratitude. Be proud of your daily accomplishments. You go girl!

7. UNPLUG!! Spend time with your family, those you love and remember to take time for yourself.

8. Commit to a quality sleep. Recharge for at least 7 hours. This is one I seriously struggle with. Once I start something I don’t like to stop which sometimes conflicts with how much sleep I get. I’ll definitely be working harder on this last one.

Click here for a free printable to do list via Pinterest + Team Confetti

What are your go to ways of staying organized and on time?
I’m always looking for new ways to improve myself. Leave me a comment below I would love to hear what helps you!

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Fab, Fit and Fun in one box?! Yes Please!

*FabFitFun Partner

Alright you guys, I can not even begin to tell you how excited I am to be a fabfitfun subscriber. There’s something to be said about having all the season’s must haves delivered to your door without having to lift a finger or haul three boys to Sephora and wait in their “quick and short” lines – don’t get me wrong I love Sephora but you know – convenience wins when you’re a mom. Besides who doesn’t love a surprise box packed to the brim of full size beauty, fashion, tech, fitness, and lifestyle products? That is what I like to call happy mail especially since Cruz loves to play with the box too.

*Spoiler Alert *
What’s actually in the Fall17 box? Where do I even begin?

Mer Sea Cozy Wrap in three different colours (annual subscribers get to pick their colour)

 

Private Party Gym Bag


trèStiQue Matte Color & Shiny Balm Lip Crayon

 

 

 

 

 

 

Your choice between a B-low the Belt Belt, The Jetset Diaries Beanie, Apple Cider Vinegar Hair Rinse and Whitening Powder and Toothrush

My fav item from the fall box is hands down the cozy wrap in grey – shocking I know!
If you don’t already get their boxes, you can sign up using the code ‘ FALLINLOVE ‘ to get $10 off your fall box! Click here to shop now

What are you picking? Leave me a comment below, I’d love to know so we can be fab fit and fun together.

xo

 

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Who run the world?

Well the quick answer is GIRLS. Don’t tell the cute assistant sitting next to me I said that though because he totally knows he runs my world.

The reason we as women are so strong is because of our ability to band together and take on anything. Motherhood, life, work, relationships, fitness, we all inspire one another to set new goals for ourselves in different areas of our busy lives.

I would like to sincerely thank all of the incredible mamas we have met over the past 10 months since we started @adventuresofcruz. When I first started his rep page I never dreamt it would be where it is today, and while it may seem small to many of you, all of the love and support we have received has blown me away. It’s really true when they say behind every successful woman is a tribe of successful women who have her back – so cheers to us!  Every single one of you have warmed my heart and for that I will be forever grateful.

Which brings me to this blog. I have always thought about starting my own creative space to share my fav products and talk about topics I really enjoy like motherhood, parenting, relationships, pregnancy, baby, design, decor, health and beauty and you will find it all here (eventually – this is still a work in progress).

Special shout out to the babes (you know who you are) who inspired me and gave me the push I needed to move more into a lifestyle space and create this blog. Women helping women, babes supporting babes, lifting each other up and not down is something I am extremely passionate about so if ANY of you need a friend, someone to talk to, advice, help or pretty much anything I am your girl. Don’t forget it! After all real queens fix each others crowns.

Until next time

xo

 

 

 

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Twinning is Winning


Literally my fav thing to do is twin with my boys or to make them match each other. I actually get like school girl giddy inside but shh don’t make fun until you try it. These Beau Hudson beanies and matching mommy and me shirt/dress are available @Mintedmethodshop Don’t worry there will be PLENTY more of these twinning photos. I should consider giving them their own section.

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