Community Over Competition

Women Supporting Women

This is something that has really been on my mind lately. A few months ago I struggled in a situation where I felt like I was being cyber bullied by someone I know in my heart I went above and beyond for as a friend. I take a lot of pride in being a loving, genuine and generous friend. Those of you that know me know I am first in line to offer my help, lend a hand or teach others.

I won’t get into details about that situation because then I would be wearing the same shoes that person wore when they walked all over me. Writing this post gives me mixed feelings because it’s not to satisfy myself and it’s definitely not to satisfy any bullies out there. It’s to raise awareness that if you are experiencing something similar, you are not alone.

“when a toxic person can no longer control you, they will try to control how others see you. The misinformation will feel unfair, but stay above it, trusting that other people will eventually see the truth, just like you did.”

After having two separate conversations lately where people I know and care about have gone through similar scenarios it really made me think about why this keeps happening? Enough cattiness. Enough treating people poorly. We as women and moms need to come together. We need to support one another. In doing so we are stronger, we are better and we can fight harder for what is right.

Let’s all be in one big girl squad where everyone can be a part of it and no one is excluded. Yup you heard me, everyone. This isn’t high school, this isn’t a clique where you have to do a certain thing or look a certain way. Let’s look at one another as equals because we all deserve that. We all have feelings.

“The truth is that once you’ve been bullied, you always wonder about peoples’ intentions and trust is hard and feels unnatural. Once you’ve seen and felt for yourself how cruel people can be, your perspective of people is forever altered and your instincts to be cautious are on high alert”

3 Steps to Help Someone Who is Bullied.

  1. Listen
  2. Encourage them to talk
  3. Remember that healing takes time

In relation to social media I think a lot of this negativity comes from their own insecurities or dare I say it jealousy. What is suppose to be a community is being turned into competition. Don’t spend your time comparing yourself to others. Try to avoid thoughts like ” How did that photo get so many likes?” or “I’ll be as good as so and so if I collaborate with that company too.”

Instead allow yourself to be creative and different while staying true to yourself. If you consume yourself with what everyone around you is doing you will be the only one left behind while everyone else reaches new successes. Always remember, it doesn’t matter what other people think and hard work always pays off.

” You can always tell who the strong women are. They are the ones you see building each other up instead of tearing each other down”

Community Over Competition

So, how do you embrace competition? Ask yourself what this means to you?
Community over competition means acknowledging that the whole point of life is *not* to be “the best” at anything, really, beyond being the best YOU. It means using your time to serve others via what you do best, lifting them up even higher than you’ve been lifted yourself. Building others up does not bring you down. Helping someone out does not inherently hurt you. Light only gets brighter by being shared.

” Find your tribe. Love them hard”

Community Over Competition + Blogging

Embrace your community like its your job because in a way, it is. As bloggers our whole schtick is to create a supportive online community. Give of yourself expecting nothing in return. Don’t expect people to follow you back, or exactly reciprocate whatever you do for them. That’s NOT relationship building – that’s mooching and trying to manipulate the system. It’s fake. And at the end of the day…it’s useless.

Long term growth and success only comes from genuine giving – building genuine relationships. Friendships built solely on tit for tat things, I hate to break it to ya: will not pass the test of time.

I would rather put in the effort and time to be a person with real, lasting friendships, and a real, genuine community, whose journey takes a little longer, than someone lacking friends and lacking community who “arrives” much faster than I do.

Community over competition means giving, giving, giving, knowing that karma uuuuusually comes full circle, but not expecting her to right this very second. By helping others you can simultaneously grow into your bigger, better, best self.

” In a world full of look at me girls be a come with me girl “


( Babes supporting babes sweater worn by me can be purchased here. Boss Babe sweater worn by Nikolina – Owner and Maker behind Pacific Knot can be purchased at Minted Method Shop. Arm knit blankets are coming soon to Pacific Knot and you can check her out on IG here in the mean time)

Thank you to the amazing babes that have welcomed me into their community. I am blessed and beyond honoured to call you my friends. Some of you have even become more like family. Stay kind and continue to celebrate each others successes without questioning our own. Cheers babes!

xo

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Hey Girl Hey!

10 Things You Probably Didn’t Know About Me

(Outfit deets: Cruz is wearing Ole.Design beanie, Huxbaby knit sweater, Tattrd threads jeans & Pretty Brave high tops. My outfit is head to toe Muse from their new fall 17 collection that you can shop TOMORROW – click here to check out their IG for info on how you can sip bubbly, shop and save)

With quite a few new followers I thought I would do a little introduction and tell you 10 things about myself that you may or may not already know.

  1. I’m Whitney and I turned 30 this year — which I have to say has been pretty fantastic so far! I am a stay at home mom to three boys who keep me constantly on my toes. Like seriously can mama have one sip of coffee before you climb on the table and try to swing from the light fixtures? Who am I kidding, coffee is over rated wine is where it’s at. When it’s too early for wine dance parties get us through the day.
  2. I can’t whistle to save my life. Many have tried to teach me this skill and failed. Playing referee to our three boys sure would be a lot easier tho if I knew how don’t you think?
  3. The sound of people chewing in a quiet room drives me C R A Y – C R A Y . I have to put on the tv, music, or GET AWAY asap. Aka before I rip the offending food out of their mouth, pull my hair out in a blind rage & glare in their general direction. Especially people who chew with their mouths open. I mean come on! Manners people…
  4. I have watched every single season of The Bachelor/ Bachelorette. It’s my not-so-guilty pleasure. I will stay up until 1 am to watch it in peace and quiet then be tired A F the next day but it’s sleep well lost. No matter how scripted or unrealistic the show might be, I love the possibility of a love story. No matter how it happens.
  5. Italy & Bora Bora are at the very top of my Travel list. Italy for obvious reasons, Its beautiful – duh! It’s where my family is from and a part of my culture that I would love to experience and learn more about. Bora Bora because I am a total beach bum. My ideal KIDLESS getaway is an all-inclusive with my hubs on a tropical beach or private hut over the south pacific sea and a minimum of 30 degree weather.
  6. I’m slightly OCD about the way my house is kept and where things belong – No boys the floor will not do. Under your beds and in the closets will not do. See all those organized bins giving you the perfect spot for each and every one of your 10,000 toys, those will do just perfect. When everything else in life is chaotic, having an organized home gives me a much-needed sense of order and control.
  7. Pizza and Tiramisu are my favourite foods. I just friggin love them!
  8. I am deathly afraid of spiders – it feels like I can’t breathe when I see there is one in the same room as me. I recently told my husband if someone offered me 5 billion to touch a spider I don’t think I’d be able to do it. Luckily I live in a house full of boys who don’t seem to mind them at all. My heroes.
  9. On the daily you’ll find me in active wear. Looking like I’ve been at the gym when I actually haven’t. Otherwise I’m an oversized sweater, ripped jeans and LWT type of girl.
    (Brandy Melville are my fav JTLYK because who isn’t on the market for more LWT’s?)
  10. I met my husband while he was filling in at the shop I was working at. Little did we know years later we would end up at a company ski trip in Whistler together. Many adorable texts & a few cheesy pick up lines later (by few I mean 100’s) our story began.

Now, tell me something I don’t know about you! I love getting to know the babes supporting me in this crazy journey. Comment below and share something about yourself, it would seriously make my day!

Anything else you want to know? Ask me them below and I’ll answer!

xo

 

 

p.s I am such a sucker for any insta-worthy wall. Big shout out to my girl Nikolina for telling me about this aaaamazing paper flower wall.

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Getting Stuff Done

8 Tips for managing your time, getting stuff done and feeling good about it!

With so few hours in the day, hundreds of emails and notifications to keep up with, projects left unfinished or piling up, learning how to manage your time is crucial. Both boys are officially in school now and starting all their extra curricular activities this week so I really need to up my time management game since we have had a fairly laid back summer – like I’m talking our floaties are still inflated sitting in the garage from all the time we spent at the lake & yes that’s going on my to do list. Finding a good balance can be a struggle for many of us moms so I am putting together a list of tips I use to stay organized and on time.

Top 5 Mistakes that cause stress:
1. The first mistake is being overwhelmed with an out of control to do list.
2.Not creating a plan or a schedule for your life.
3.Not having a morning ritual
4.Not practicing self care.
5.Not having boundaries for social media, family time and personal time.

Incase you didn’t know I am seriously OCD so naturally I am going to start with decluttering. Declutter your life, your desk and your to do list. You’ll start to feel better already I promise. It feels good to get rid of clutter that is bringing you down.

Next step is to Plan! Be realistic with your daily expectations and make sure you stick to them. Checking tasks off as you go is a great way to stay motivated. While you’re at it, make yourself a morning ritual.

Now that you have your tasks for the day, prioritize them. Remember it’s not a race to get everything done the fastest. Try to be the most effective. Keep focused – eye on the prize. Once you get to a task, make sure you complete it no matter what. There’s no room for procrastination. Most people tend to tackle easy tasks first to push out the difficult ones. Don’t fall into this trap. Once you get organized, STAY organized. Getting organized takes longer than all these tips combined so once you are, stay organized. Plus it will become effortless the more you stick with it.

Here is what a successful day looks like in my shoes…

1. I set my alarm for 30 mins before I actually need to get up. Getting an early start and gaining that extra 10-30 mins starts the day with little to no stress which is key when your making lunches, setting out clothes, feeding three kids three different breakfasts and trying to get two of them to different schools on time. I call this the morning hustle and I know you all have your own version of this.

2. Picture the desired result. Set this is as your intention for the day.
Use an affirmation to start the day on a positive note. Here are a couple affirmations I like:
I love myself I believe in myself, I support myself.
I have the freedom and power to create the life I desire

3. Set your schedule. List your to do’s. Group similar tasks for more efficiency.
Here is an example of what an average day looks like for me:
6:30 – alarm
7:50 – Noah off too middle school
8:15 – Joey off to elementary school
8:35 – gym/exercise
10:00 – Plan dinner, go to grocery store if needed
10:15 – run errands
11:15 – nap time/house work
12:00 – catch up on emails
12:30 – work on projects
2:30 – school pick up
3:00 – start making dinner
5:00 – eat dinner and get boys ready for soccer.
7:00 – Bath & Bedtime routines for all 3 boys
8:00 – MW time ( Mike & Whitney – this usually consists of our fav reality tv and putting our feet up)

Incase you are looking at this list thinking she doesn’t eat breakfast or lunch and where is Cruz? We eat and he is attached to my hip 24-7. This is just an example. If I wrote out every second of the day in between each one of these steps would include, playing, teaching, changing, feeding & boobing Cruz every 30 mins – at least that’s what it feels like some days.

4. Select your top three and keep focused on your priorities. Get to work. Starting small to gain momentum can sometimes help keep you motivated but remember don’t take the easy ones and neglect the hard ones. Once you’ve started one task don’t start another until this one is completed.

5. Plan for tomorrow. Set your future self up for success.

6. Practice gratitude. Be proud of your daily accomplishments. You go girl!

7. UNPLUG!! Spend time with your family, those you love and remember to take time for yourself.

8. Commit to a quality sleep. Recharge for at least 7 hours. This is one I seriously struggle with. Once I start something I don’t like to stop which sometimes conflicts with how much sleep I get. I’ll definitely be working harder on this last one.

Click here for a free printable to do list via Pinterest + Team Confetti

What are your go to ways of staying organized and on time?
I’m always looking for new ways to improve myself. Leave me a comment below I would love to hear what helps you!

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Who run the world?

Well the quick answer is GIRLS. Don’t tell the cute assistant sitting next to me I said that though because he totally knows he runs my world.

The reason we as women are so strong is because of our ability to band together and take on anything. Motherhood, life, work, relationships, fitness, we all inspire one another to set new goals for ourselves in different areas of our busy lives.

I would like to sincerely thank all of the incredible mamas we have met over the past 10 months since we started @adventuresofcruz. When I first started his rep page I never dreamt it would be where it is today, and while it may seem small to many of you, all of the love and support we have received has blown me away. It’s really true when they say behind every successful woman is a tribe of successful women who have her back – so cheers to us!  Every single one of you have warmed my heart and for that I will be forever grateful.

Which brings me to this blog. I have always thought about starting my own creative space to share my fav products and talk about topics I really enjoy like motherhood, parenting, relationships, pregnancy, baby, design, decor, health and beauty and you will find it all here (eventually – this is still a work in progress).

Special shout out to the babes (you know who you are) who inspired me and gave me the push I needed to move more into a lifestyle space and create this blog. Women helping women, babes supporting babes, lifting each other up and not down is something I am extremely passionate about so if ANY of you need a friend, someone to talk to, advice, help or pretty much anything I am your girl. Don’t forget it! After all real queens fix each others crowns.

Until next time

xo

 

 

 

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